Symptoms
by Yoseob Aggression
Summary: The sequel to 'Do You Think She Knows How To Knock'. After having spent six years locked up in a mental asylum, Elsa struggles to adjust to life on the outside. This story will consist of semi-related one-shots based on the themes of recovery, living with mental illness, love, friendship and death.
1. Chapter 1

Elsa's cheeks were indescribably sore having spent two days smiling non stop. The pain did not bother the blonde whatsoever. Her best friend had lost her dreams, her freedom and even worse, her sanity all in one night. Now, after seven years of therapy, she was finally granted another shot at living among the sane. Why shouldn't Elsa be ecstatic over something like that? The brunette seemed to feel Elsa's eyes on her as she packed her suitcase. Belle turned her head to meet the blonde's eyes.

"What's with the goofy grin?" her brunette friend asked as she threw her final article of clothing into the open bag.

"Nothing, I guess. I'm just happy that you're finally free, Belle" Elsa stated, honestly. The brunette couldn't help but smile at the younger woman. She failed to recall the last time anyone was happy for her specifically.

"Yeah, who would have thought? It's not everyday that a dreadfully ill person like me is deemed as a non threat to society" Belle replied, in a somewhat monotone manner as she zipped up her luggage. Grabbing the handle of her bag, the brunette began to walk towards her bedroom door.

"Would you mind seeing me off? The taxi has already arrived and I'm afraid I can't dally for much longer"

"Not at all"

The pair proceeded to walk through the hospital's halls. Both women were silent. Elsa desperately wanted to talk to her friend. On their brief journey to the institutes's exit, the blonde tried to think of ways to start a conversation however, her social skills or lack thereof prevented her from doing so. There were so many things she wanted to say. Feeling frustrated with her inability to communicate in a non awkward fashion, the blonde settled for occasionally glancing up at Belle. Much to Elsa's surprise, she noticed that the brunette's eyes were glistening ever so slightly.

"Well, I suppose this is it" Belle announced once they reached their destination. "I'll miss you" she said, as she wrapped her arms around the blonde.

"I'll miss you too" Elsa replied, burying her face into the brunette's chest. Her words were muffled and barely comprehensible.

 _"_ Promise you'll visit me when you get out?"

"Of course I will. Without you I wouldn't have made it this far!" Elsa replied, removing her head from the brunette's shirt.

"Thanks, Elsa. I love you" Belle said sweetly, before planting a kiss on the blonde's forehead.

Elsa was paralysed as she watched the other woman get into the back seat of the taxi with her small suitcase. She could not raise her hand to wave goodbye to her one and only companion. Once the black vehicle left her sight, the blonde sprinted to her room as quickly as her foot could carry her, ignoring all the sympathetic smiles the orderlies shot at her.

* * *

Two years later, Elsa found herself sitting across from her father, feeling as stiff as a statue and highly uncomfortable. She was helplessly nervous as her relationship with her father was strained (for obvious reasons) and communication between the pair had been extremely sparse over the past six years. Besides sending her an obligatory 'merry Christmas' and 'happy birthday' card, Adgar tried to keep communication with his daughter at the very bare minimum. The blonde's eyes were trained to the floor. She failed to seek out the courage to meet her father's gaze. Elsa dug her nails into palm of her hands, hoping that pain would somehow make this cripplingly awkward situation easier to endure. Adgar cleared his throat, causing Elsa to jump at the unexpected sound.

"So, you're schizophrenic?" he asked, fixing his daughter with an accusing glance.

"Yes, daddy" the blonde confirmed.

"Call me sir"

"Yes, sir" Elsa mumbled.

"Allow me to make sure I have my facts correct. Your explosive temper coupled with visual and auditory hallucinations brought about by undiagnosed schizophrenia are the factors which pushed you to kill my wife?"

"That's right, sir. My obsession with Anna was also a contributing factor"

"Thanks for your honesty, Elsa" Adgar said, rising from his chair and stretching his limbs. "I think it's high time we got home. Let's go"

The man strolled towards the institute's reception desk and Elsa followed him obediently without word. As Adgar scribbled his signature down on numerous documents, the blonde's mind began to run rampant. She had spent the last five years dreaming of this day, but she felt terrified now that all her dreams were about to come true. Elsa no longer had much to anticipate. Soon enough, she would be thrown into a harsh and demanding world which she knew very little about. A world without kind, familiar faces to give her medication and to escort the blonde to and from therapy sessions and the dinner table. She didn't have a routine any more and that thought petrified the now twenty three year old woman.

 _I suppose some birds are meant to be caged._

Elsa's heart sank as she shuffled her feet through the whitewashed corridors for the very last time. Two things prevented the blonde from jumping into the nearest traffic jam or from stabbing anyone who dared to make eye contact with her. Those things were a promise Elsa intended to keep and the possibility of seeing Anna again.

 **Author's note: I think I accidentally named the first chapter after the title of this story... and I just realized that I misspelled the word symptoms. I'm the worst person. Anyway, thank you very much for reading the first chapter of Symptoms and I hope you enjoyed it!**


	2. Chapter 2

"Elsa, it's time for your pills!" Agdar yelled from across the garden. The blonde's eyes snapped to meet his. Chores completely forgotten about, a pair of hedge clippers fell from her hands and onto the family's neatly mowed lawn. With a weak smile, Elsa trudged sluggishly towards the chestnut haired man.

Normalcy for Elsa came in the form of multiple glass capsules. Stilling and zombifying her. She was no longer capable of complex thought, at least not for an extended period of time. Every once and a while, Elsa's intelligent mind would begin to work as it did before she started taking heavy medication, but then it would shut down unexpectedly, much to the blonde's frustration. Her entire personality was nearly reduced to a blank slate. Although Elsa hated feeling inferior to her former self, the blonde accepted her fate as the drugs made her feel relatively ordinary and growing up, that's all she wanted to be. Her temperament was considerably more mild and the wretched woman who once controlled her life was nowhere to be seen. That's not to say that Moira was gone completely, in fact Elsa could hear the elderly woman whisper derogatory remakes every night before slumber enveloped her. Every time this happened, the blonde tried to drown out the noise by placing a pillow over her head and covering her ears with it. Ignoring Moira proved to be an increasingly hard task as Elsa believed some of what the lady said to be true.

 _'What a pathetic, lost, little girl'_

 _'Your existence disgusts me'_

 _'Take all the pills you want, but that won't magically make your father and mother forgive you. Your medication can't erase the past._

The last comment stung Elsa the most. More than anything, Elsa yearned for the forgiveness and acceptance of her parents.

When Elsa was very young, Adgar and Idun spent countless hours of their lives situated at the kitchen table, trying and failing to understand the mumbles of their cryptic daughter as she conversed with the fairies. The blonde never saw the black marks beneath their eyes, nor did she know that her parents risked losing their jobs several times for her benefit. The couple were both behind on their work and were forced to frequently call in sick so they could take their daughter to and from the children's hospital and appointments with specialists. Only now, was Elsa beginning to piece things together and as a result, she was drowning in a pool of her own guilt. To compensate for the grief Elsa caused them during her childhood days, the blonde agreed to do any and every chore her father asked her to. The blonde made sure all these tasks were completed with a smile and a song.

When she eventually reached her father, the blonde was positively perky. The sun was shining brightly and she was in close proximity to Anna. Elsa knew this for certain as she had seen the redhead many times since her return home. Her father appeared to be in a better mood than usually. Most days, he greeted Elsa with a scowl but today, his facial expressions were more soft. Adgar looked stern but not hostile.

"Here" the man said, placing a miniature mountain of capsules in the blonde's grubby hands.

"Thank you so much sir!" she exclaimed before throwing the small pile of medication into her mouth.

Like a flick of the switch, Adgar's mood took a turn for the worse.

"Hey, spit them out _right_ now! You're only supposed to take a few at a time. Do you want to choke to death, you _fucking_ retard!?" her father roared.

The blonde obediently spat out her medication. In an effort to conceal the tears brewing in her eyes, Elsa turned her back to Adgar. She swiftly swallowed the lump in her throat before opening her mouth to speak again.

"I'm going to take these with a glass of water" Elsa said in her bravest voice.

"Good. And stop leaving my tools on the ground" Adgar scolded from across the garden. His words fell deaf to Elsa's ears as she made her exit, fingers clenching the capsules and arms wrapped tightly around her torso.

When the blonde entered the house, she instinctively ran to the nearest restroom and locked the door behind her. Falling down to her knees, Elsa leaned in over the toilet bowl.

 _I was smart before and I can be smart again. I just need to get these pills out of my system. I'm not a retard, daddy and I can prove it._

For a moment or two, Elsa allowed her index finger to linger on the inside of her mouth. Shaking her head, the woman stood up on her own two feet.

 **Author's note: Hi! First I would like to apologize for how offensively infrequent my update schedule is. Unfortunately, there's not much I can do to improve it as I have very little free time now. School, studying and Kingdom Hearts have devoured my life. Secondly, I hope this chapter wasn't boring to read. I've decided to put a greater emphasis on developing the characters and giving them back stories rather than pushing the plot forward. Please feel free to tell me your opinions on this new style! The next chapter shall feature Belle who is my favourite princess/main girl so I'm eager to start working on it. Also, I'm aware of how patchy my writing is and I'm trying to improve.**

 **Thank you for your time.**


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